Modern Love vs. Traditional Love: How to Display Your Love Language

By • 1 month ago with one reply

Imagine this scene: it’s Valentine’s Day, your partner’s birthday, your anniversary or any other important relationship milestone. You want to show your S.O. you really care, right? Maybe you know how you would want them to show you love, but you’re struggling to determine how they appreciate love shown. Well, we’re here to help! One of our favorite places to start when it comes to all things love are “The Five Love Languages”. This concept was introduced in Gary Chapman’s 1995 book ‘The Five Love Languages: How to Express Heartfelt Commitment to Your Mate’. Since then, there have been countless discussions, interpretations, quizzes and more to help us learn about how we give and receive love.

We noticed that while some of us are more traditional in our interpretations of the love languages, there’s a modern interpretation to each one as well. So whether you met your plus one through mutual friends and enjoy sending love letters, or you swiped right and love to tag them in memes all day, there’s a version of all five love languages just for you.

P.S. We know these are the extremes! Your unique love is probably a beautiful mix of traditional love and modern love, and your ideal Valentine’s Day (and any gifts you choose to give) should display just that.

Words of Affirmation

Modern Love – The ‘Kisses Bae 😍’ type

Every couple has their collection of most used emojis, pet names and phrases to convey their love and affection. With emojis, memes, gifs and the many other new forms of technology, there are infinite modern ways to say ‘I love you.’

Traditional Love – The ‘I Love You, Darling’ Type

Not the texting and Snapchat type? There’s nothing like some old-fashioned verbal communication to tell someone how you feel. Saying those three special words in person clears up any chance of miscommunication, and to some, it can feel more meaningful when expressed face to face.


Modern Love –  The ‘Unique Succulent’ Type

If your S.O. is more into the process than the product, gift them a sweet succulent that they can nurture and display proudly on their desk, nightstand or countertop. Bonus tip: succulents are easy to maintain, even if you don’t quite have a green thumb! We don’t want any love fern situations happening.

Traditional Love – The ‘Long-Stemmed Roses’ Type

There’s nothing more traditional than gifting your Valentine roses and chocolate! Not only is the sweet candy treat special, but the fragrant and unmistakable smell of a fresh rose is swoon-worthy!

Acts of Service

Modern Love – Ordering Postmates From Your Favorite Restaurant

Feel like staying in this Valentine’s day? That doesn’t mean you can’t still enjoy your favorite food! Check out Postmates, Door Dash or Uber Eats for a service that will deliver your desired cuisine right to your door. Bonus tip: No cooking or cleaning means more time to spend with your favorite person!

Traditional Love – Preparing a Home-Cooked Meal

This one is a given, and it’s especially meaningful if you aren’t usually the one to cook dinner. Find a recipe that isn’t too complicated for a first-timer, and treat your S.O. to an evening where they don’t have to lift a finger. Bonus tip: It’ll save you some money instead of going out for dinner.

Quality Time

Modern Love – Netflix & Chill

We know, this one can have a bad connotation. But if you and your partner enjoy simply bonding over a season of your favorite show, (and quite possibly debating it afterward) get out the popcorn and enjoy. No binge-watching judgment here!

Traditional love – Take a Swing Dance Lesson

Mix it up this Valentine’s day! If your partner has mentioned couples dance lessons, a paint night or another special activity, arrange it for them as a surprise! Not only will they appreciate your thoughtfulness, you’ll have taken care of all the planning for them.

Physical Touch

Modern Love – Bring on the PDA

If you and your partner are both ok with some physical touch and affection, go for it! This could be as simple as sharing some kisses in public or even just openly showing your affection in front of friends or family members. The key point here – make sure you’re both on the same page with what you’re comfortable with!

Traditional Love – Behave Like Your Boss is Watching

This one is especially important for some of us depending on our age, religion, and cultural norms. If you or your S.O. prefer to be more modest, there’s nothing wrong with keeping it PG and exhibiting physical touch by holding hands, or simply snuggling up at a movie theater. Like we said, for the modern displays of physical touch, the most crucial piece is that you and your partner are openly communicative of how you want to display your love in public and private.

We hope these examples of both traditional love and modern love helped you think about what version best suits your love language, and your partner’s too. Happy Valentine’s Day!

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